Sufjan turned 50 yesterday. He is 30 years older than me. I miss being on Tumblr, his was my second favourite blog after Dogwood. I keep checking on Dogwood and they're doing okay. I often get this strong urge to go back but i won't. All the people i love keep getting older and it's scary. Not a huge fan of birthdays although mine don't make me feel miserable like they used to starting last year. I would like to spend my next birthday looking at the sky and walking around somewhere. Very silent and very quite. It is okay to grow old. I feel too old and too young simultaneously. I'm listening to Lil Peep's Atlanta shows, they were recoded eight days before he died. Sucks that he's dead. I am doing okay tonight. It's just me and my sister sleeping in my room. Glad i don't have to stare at the fan. Will finally get some work done because too bad i feel like doing stuff only at night. As previously mentioned i will also watch the movie on the edge of seventeen. found out there are two movies with this name, will watch the new one. Tonight i'll be listening to Lil Peep. I hope nobody calls it gym music to my face to piss me off. Honestly it's just me being a hater, people are fine. I also have gotten a LOT of control over my stalking habits like i won't be finding out every public information about Will Toledo or Sufjan Stevens what i will do though is keep tabs on Bristol's professors, not do anything just keep tabs. Lil Peep was such an angel. He's singing " Stick that needle in my eye" and honestly i've been thinking about that scene from Oyasumi Punpun where Punpun damages his eye. He was 20. I think about Punpun everyday now that I'm 20. I don't have a headache right now and it feels wonderful. July is a nice month, we have Tanabate on 7th July and then Mitchel Welling's birthday on 9th. Will Toledo was born on the same day as my friend from 8th and 9th grade. I miss her sometimes. She has the same degree as me. We weren't like really good friends but we were friends and it helped me. Really grateful. I like all the people who were friends with me. Went to this shop tpday and i recalled seeing this girl from school there as well back in 2011. I wonder how she is, she left school. Most of the people i used to be friends with left school, sucks, even more because i don't remember them. A few years i could name them all. Was talking to my sister and he good friend from !st grade lowkey her arch nemesis, sad. real sad. I need a sugar mommy and by that i mean someone who will teach me how to crochet, from the very basics, especially Amigurumi. I'll finish this Lil Peep playlist of his Atlanta show then do maths to the powerline noises from Serial experiments Lain (icon). I kinda wanna go for a walk because i love looking at the sky again (without the evil sun) let's see. Will do stuff today. I planned on shiutting my phone again but then i won't be able to use google messages simply on my laptop so i'll use it only at night. Sometimes i do miss Lil Peep. He came in my dream once. I probably wrote about it here or maybe my previous blog, i think my previous blog. I have things and people to look up to so i'll go work. Also i need to drink more water. I knew all his tattoos, even the ones he covered and replaced. All the colors he dyed his hair and all the cars he liked and how much he liked his mom. He died when I was 12. I should think less about people who have nothing to do with me. Will also cut down on sugar, i finally no longer feel the need to constantly indulge maybe once in a while, all credits goes to my sensitive teeth. That's expected tho because my teeth are shifting because of the invisaline. I honestly don't like it because i have two very small cavitives in my front teeth. I will brush daily from today (2:34AM) and i'll do it twice a day. Can't wait for my glassesand the new twenty one pilots album. bye, will go drink water and study. everything will be okay and so will the people i care about and the people who they care about. everything will be okay. We can only hope. Illinoise turns 2o July 5th. Will try to listen to that as well. A girl just moaned at 0:56 on the live performance of "U Said", honestly same. Last night I was searching "Will Toledo moaning" on youtube because he moans a lot (atleast the songs i heard yesterday) and sadly there wasn't a complation. I'm done. I hope i get my glasses soon. Just got a very cute idea that I'll incorporate in my personal project. Really looking forward to it. Love you Peep. I don't rewatch/reread stuff but will start rewatching gravity falls everyday, preferably with my siblings. Ove you Ariel and Alex Hirsch. I wish there was something that would get back my love for space and stuff. fine tbh. I'll be back when i am better. Goodnight, will listen to this once before i go.
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