nervous young woman (pulling out nails with the back of a hammer)

 watch this video. (self advice) // he ends the videos saying wite down your thoughts haha get on my level boozo.

almost done with Adventure Time, currently at s9 ep 11.

yesterday's exam was horrible.

i ate momos and it was nice and ten ruppees cheaper than usual because i ate them from a different shop.

i want to sleep all day for my birthday and maybe go out alone and eat chicken something like maybe butter chicken, i never really was a fan of it but i like it more now probably because of my boyfriend or maybe i just like eating it. 

my next exam is dsa, it is tomorrow. i am not really super woorried about it, i think it is doable.

i kinda want a real proper isolation slump for self development purposes but i cannot cut everyone plus whatever leve of isolation i put myself through it always ends up into a spiral.

i am not really into astronomy anymore. it is hard to accept that someting you have loved since like you were a kid doesn't budge. i know what changed. i read and read and read and read about a lot of things but mostly black holes after It ended for the second time, apart from painting i was always doing astronomy. i wanted to tell someone about it and this one night i go to my parents but they were like not today and the next day it was a same and i tried for maybe a week but they never had the time i guess but i know it wasn't their fault. It was also the pandemic and there were other things to worry about than listen about blackholes, so i packed up all my stuff and went completly on the internet which wasn't the best decision ever. I am saying this because it's almost six years now and i still have the same 11:11 wish. I think i want ot move on from it,not because i don't want it anymore but probably because i do not have it in me. It's like maths, no matter how much i try and try i always hear the mocking of eighth grade where i scored 36. None of this should hold me back and it's not that deep and i should get over it but i simply cannot. 

I am also quitting Duolingo soon, i do not need it to keep track of how long i've been living, it started around 12 may if i remmeber. My current streak is 

The sky was pretty yesterday. 

I like Adventure Time because it also reminds me of Flatsound and i do see a lot of his music being inspired by it. 

for my birthday i got this purple top which i hope is cool, a pair of jeans that fit's me at the waist pretty cool but isn't flared enough:/ I also got this belt which is pretty cool, it is brown and studded. 

i have a lot to learn and improve as always. I am getting socially akward again, i also chopped off my bangs, for in detail updates go check out my previous blog which is logged on my phone unlike this one, i look pretty weird but also eh i dont care enough. 

This blog isn't really a true representation of what i am right now or how i feel or what i like but i do not want to change it either because i remmeber i sat down for like 3 days to make it what it is.

my parents might come on my birthday, real nice of them but i lowk don't wanna be with anyone, Bristol was about to come but her college omg they are gonna suck our poor child's source can you believe that her last exam is on 20th and her 6th sem is from 23rd like okay sure.

I do not know if i wrote about Melbourne here or at all but she is pretty coherent now, not sure what helped her but glad it did. She is still attached to the bible tho. She mentioned her not doing well and Bristol told me to get back to her after my exams and that is what i plan to do. I did text her on insta because she said she needed to talk to someone but then she told me she wants to talk in person instead of texts which is okay. Did you know Melbourne was born just two weeks after me? I think that is pretty awesome.

The epstein files are horrendous oh my god i went on jmail.world yesterday and it was not good. People are genuinenly evil.

Will Toledo has an amazing voice. I never agreed but Ethan (curly haired guy) is pretty cool. 

I think people eventually get over stuff when they have better things to do, not sure when will it be my turn tho.  

I like my bedsheet, this is my favourite one, let me show you. 

Tigger says hi, oh and my mom bought me piglet but we returned it because the quality was bad. I never really liked him tbh fuck ugly piece of shit except Melbourne once said i remind her of Piglet so i yea i started liking him/her a bit. i think Piglet was a guy with ocd who's pink. eh. 

This is what i sent her lol. 

I will go back to adventure time, then my exam, bye bye.