I'm going back home :):

So yea, I haven't written in a few days because I've been doing okay! I only write here when I'm like crying like hell and shit. Also want to clarify that both my parents are actually really nice. So are my friends like Bristol, Melbourne and Germany. I do have have other friends too and they're also very nice. But yeah my 12th grade class teacher, that one girl who troubled me a lot, HIM and the others, and a few more bad people are actually shit. What I mean to say is that even though I might talk shit about people I'm supposed to love, I still love them at the end of the day. Also body acne you can go fuck yourself, I have more than enough on my face.

This post is about my breast size. They aren't equal. Like what the fuck. My right one is bigger and I feel like it has gotten more bigger. I've slep on my left side almost my entire life because dad saic ut helps with digestion and I feel like it may be a factor. Also I don't know if I wrote about it here but sometime ago I had accidently touched my breasts (I only touch them in the shower to wash them) and they felt somewhat hard. Like idk a ball type thing. I also started my period today and I've noticed since I camd here my period has kinda changed. Like earlier it used to be liquids and clumps but now it's just really sticky discharge and it's kinda really opaque and it's brown. Earlier it was red or maroon red. I really want to see a doctor but obviously I've scared to go there, in general, plus if my past experience plus it's embarassing and I'd rather die. Also I have a lot of body hair so I am suspecting shit like PCOS abd POCD and like in highschool I remember many of my classmates had it but idk bro. Also my sister won an award, she's also a captain and she draws really well and I'm not jealous but I feel like because I'm the older one thus was expected of me and I've failed my parents as a child. That's all,  I'm personally very happy for my sister and the fact she's becoming achieving stuff but I hope she isn't pressurised a lot. 

Lastly, it's a bit weird but my breasts make the logo of twenty one pilots and when I was sixteen on 14th of January 2022.  I carved the twenty one pilots logo on the back of my wrist. It's a scar now. I will include pictures and this is a trigger warning if you don't want to see all that. Also I carved a logo from their trench era on my other arm but it was more like a catscratch rather than a styro so I won't post that. 

Yes I have body hair but I did shave it all of this Sunday with a razor to feel more feminine maybe that's the reason I feel okay lately. I'd very much like to get rid of facial hair and acne too as well. As well as my weight , I guess losing weight could help my breasts too.