chat, did my grandfather catch me watching corn?

I've been on thst edging grind ever since. Like fakkk. The day I stop watching corn is the day j become a biblically accurate angel. So, it was like 3:30 am and I was watching corn and bam I saw my grandfather pass by. I sleep with my grandma and my grandpa sleeps in the next room. Technically the brightness was low and assuming he was sleepy he didn't see plus my legs were facing the way he passed by. But I was lying on my stomach and didn't start edging yet. As per for the corn video people were wearing cloths but the girl was wearing a swimsuit. Bitch if my grandfather actually found me doing shut imma kill myself fr. Anyway it's 5 am now, I went to open the main door and a fucking lizard fell on me. Fuck fuck fuck why. My grandma started laughter 😔. Anyway my grandfather woke up but didn't make eye contact with me while passing by.  Okay rn at 05:12 I was like "goodmorning grandpa and he replied goodmorning but like he seemed angry. Fuck chat help me. 

Also, currently it's me, my grandparents, my mom and siblings and my my uncle aunt and their two kids. All the adults seem to be angry with me cause I don't sleep on time, I barely eat and I am in the ohone and I don't have a college yet, nor do I have good scores to get one.  So much happening in my lufe and everything wants to maje me kms kms kms. 

Also, my mom allegedly caught me edging a few days ago. Like a few days before coming here my dad was not home one night so I stayed up. The room was dark and I was edging. The door was shut. All of a sudden I see light and realised my mom is standing there and I tried to change screens do fucking fast I bet my mom realised. She then later tells me she was once nineteen too so I tell her that phones didn't exist back then. Lke5my mom knows I edge 😭😭😭😭. Chatttttt.

Chat, pray for me. My grandfather used to be a police officer so he has big ass guns, oray he doesn't shoot me for bringing dishonour to the family.

Also, I was rude to my mom cause she keeps asking me to eat. I did apologize to her but I am so shit. I deserve to die 🥰.

Chat, update: it's 10:46 am and it's 2nd June??? I thought it was first, damn. HAPPY PRIDE MONTH. So, anyway, my grandpa keeps giving me this very certain stern look and waking up late doesn't help that. Am I cooked ? Should I plan self exit?

I'm currently trying to shit but my constipated ass does not givf consent to shit. It's been days again. Also I was supposed to vote, bit as I'm not at home I cannot. My father did. Also, I don't have my voter I'd card either because the government is lazy. I wanted to vote. Alex Hirsch always says to vote. I'm a disappointment. Rather, constipated disappointment.