one thing mitchel welling likes is being spat in the moth. he is funny though. i don't think will toledo is funny but luckily andrew katz, the band's drummer has a similar sense of humor as me. all will toledo does is be cute. last night i really went jumoing from haha heehe picturesof will toledo on twitter because i've all the ones on pinterest to full blown stalking flatsound to grieving lil peep's death. most of his popular music came out when he was the age i am. i really love the music i listen too. mitchel welling was the sweetest lil kid ever but so was gustav elijah ahr. he had a mom who loved him and still continues to love him. she tried to understand and help him in whatever way she could. i honestly dont like writing here from my laptop but i also dont wanna log back into all my gmail aacounts. i believe i have more gmail accounts than my age. let's have a bet? i say yes. gonna go count brb. btw i have 12,000 pictures on my phone from 21st february this year, till now. around 9000 are screenshots. so i won. 23 gmail accounts. most of them are honestly to store pictures from i highschool because again terrible memory. i have so many pictures of mitchel welling and will toledo and sufjan stevens that i wanna. i found this picture of mitch yesterday and he honestly looks so pretty, like made me realise how literally everyone is pretty. but yea i tried finding that pic almost everywhere but faild, later while stalking him i found it was the soundclod cover of one of his songs from if we could just pretend before it was an album. i will post all those pictures here soon. mitchel's dad was honestly so sweet. also today is the day i accepted i really don't like mangoes. i didn't like them as much as a kid. then i found out someone i didnt liked did not like mangoes even though their favourite color was yellow. if you've read all the posts which you havent and that's okay but yes i started liking mangoes but honestly not a huge fan. we have lots of mangoes at home that my grandfather sent from the farm. i love my friends very much and you would assume that i'm referring to all the friends i've probably ever mentioned on this blog which isn't much tbh because i tend to write more about myself. honestly just two at the moment. today particularly i wanted to appreciate them. i had a small talk with quite a few of my classmates yesterday, they are really skilled people. drawing cooking robotics you name it. i will do everything i've planned to. i will now write a list of things i wanna do before this year ends but honestly i also don't wanna. i definetly am (most of the time) a different person at college. honestly apart from the exams week, or like since may, if we exclude that, i was pretty much doing great i believe starting december, being that person. it's this apartmeent, especially this fucking room i guess. i was looking at my walls today and there were blank spaces for artworks i never finished and probably neber will. i made these noodles yesterday (well a less fancy version) but yes i loved eating those a few years ago and it felt so nice eating them, i am really good at making fried eggs given i literally have a ten year experience in cooking them. my brother is somewhat like me but also not like me, it's pretty funny to watch him at times. i love my sister too. i was figuring out how i feel towards myy family. i have very clear divisions: parents and siblings. wont desribe how i feel towards my parents because writing it down feels repetitive but yes i do love them. coming to my siblings, i didn't really love them, like what am i supposed to do with someone who just cries all day and blinks and makes weird noises and stuff, if being honest i never wanted siblongs but rather someone around my age which would translate to a twin. honestly older siblings are a pain in the ass and ik because i am. so yes, i did have a very weird relationship with them where i was supposed to love them but like it was the kind of love that comes because we are related. i think the first time ever that i felt i want to and need to do something for them was the night of 28th February 2020, my parent's 17th wedding anniversary, a week after i turned fifteen. i am not a good sister yet and my parents say a lot of things and then then don't talk honestly they both need a bipolar diagnosis but like sorry but yea handling three kids is hard nut to be honest they wanted a son like that is the literal truth. my mom was telling me what pirpose do i serve in this house because i do nothing which is valid but i do help when she asks or isn't around. dad dose't talk anymore. i honestly don't mind my parents a lot. what did upset me a bit was that yesterday my mom made this little fishes i forgot the name but yea as a kid i used to fill my pockets with them and walk around my then house, when mom brought that up dad said the wrong plce. also honestly something i find almost funny is how i used to skip school in 12th grade to stay home at times to spend more time with my parents and now that both my siblings go to school it's the same scenaro, this time it's different but same. i would write a lot more and so much honestly but i wanna lowkey piss and also eat a sandwhich or something. don't take any of this seriously obviously. i will go watch adventure time and study later hopefully. it was also josh's birthday wgich brings me to the point of how much i love their friendship, twently one pilots isn't just a band to me it is so so so much more than that. there is a war in my spotify between twin fantasy (MtM) and all of flatsounds songs. i am pretty decent at stalking which reminds me of another thing, i had blog on tumblr that i loved but i could't view it without having a blog myself. i promised myself i will never go back there so while searching for mitch's tumbler blog i came across this website that lets me view private blogs. it was so refreshing to see this person doing well, i don't know them personally but we did have a few brief interactions when i was there. i stalked them as well so i know pretty much a lot about them but yes, their blog was and even somewhat is a huge source of help and i will be checking it often to see how they're doing because recently they weren't but that's okay, people can always feel better, i feel better lately. disclaimer: this one and the last post aren't reall serving any purpose or like encounter or experience just sitting and typing because i was bored of watching yt shorts and edrinking mango milkshake. so i will delete them, or archieve them. let's see. this was more of a bored mindset. i really do hope mitchel welling is okay, only if i knew the full name of his therapist neal i would even contact him but honestly as long as he has billie i think he will be soewhat okay. my mom does cook well most of the time. i love my cinnamoroll mug, ik this is the morbillionth time i am writing this year but it complements anything i drink so well. also i am not sure if i mentioned this in my blog but i don't fw my melody at all. like in all of sanro universe i just have beef with her cause honestly she makes me feel the same way she kuromi feels about her. stay moisturized and hydrated y'all. mom will prolly make something nice for me today, something she used to make a few years ago, let's see.
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